This is Christian Advice?!?!?
I have had this on my heart for a while now. I'm finally taking the time to put it into print. My intentions are not to belittle, point fingers or rebuke anyone. It is to hopefully encourage other single Christian women and men.
No matter where you are in your life (single-hood, newlywed, new career, parenthood, etc...), there are always others who want to advise you how to be. Prior to my marriage and since my divorce, I have received some of the most outrageous advice. What baffles me the most is the unsolicited advice from Christians to me regarding being single.
Here's a sampling of actual unsolicited advice offered to me:
"Elizabeth, you shouldn't talk about God so much. No man will marry a woman who talks about God as much as you do."
"Elizabeth, now that you're single again, please be careful. Don't do what other women do and run to church everyday"
"You should really keep you hair long if you want a man to notice you."
"You should lose the weight before you think of dating."
"If you don't cook, clean, or do housework, how do you expect to find a man?"
"You'd get a man if you'd wear make up more often."
"You should start dating to test the waters and get a feel for it again."
So here's my unsolicited advice to all you single brothers and sisters in Christ...
1. Get in the Word and date Christ first and foremost
2. Get content with your life now
3. Equally as important... Be Yourself!
One of the best movies on being a single Christian is "Mr. Right Now". There's a moment where the single's pastor is preaching and one thing he says is don't fall to the sin of changing yourself to attract a significant other. You should allow the Lord to change you, to grow you in Christ and not let your faith fall to the desires of molding yourself for "Mr. Right Now" (Ms. Right Now for you men). Wait for God's best for you and discard the bad solicited and unsolicited advice that well-meaning Christians (and Non-Christians, too) send your way.
Thank you and God Bless!
Elizabeth Varian
