"For the scripture saith, Whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed. For there is no difference between the Jew and the Greek: for the same Lord over all is rich unto all that call upon him. For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved." Romans 10: 11-13 (KJV)

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I Dared To Pray the Prayer

by Elizabeth Varian

I dared to pray the prayer of Jesus before the betrayal of Judas. "Father God, Your Will not my own." Then there was Judas. Judas gave the kiss on the cheek and turned me over to the heartache that was to follow. The tears of sorrow were shed and the crown of anger stood over my head. The suffering had a reason.

To the crowds, it appeared as though Jesus had been defeated. To the soldiers, they thought they overpowered Him. To the Pharisees, they thought their plans were masterfully executed. To me, it looked like another trial of pain that could not be defeated.

Jesus was not defeated. He conquered. He was not overpowered. He overcame. The masterful plan was executed, but it was God's that won over all others. And I, I was not given a trial. I was given a gift. A beautiful gift that surpasses any gift given in my past, better than that of human love, and one I never saw coming.

God gave me the gift of forgiveness - forgiveness of self. Almost one year to the day and I never saw the guilt growing, but I did feel its weight.

Thank you, God, for this release. Praise be to You that I may accept the forgiveness You gave me - a year ago. I exalt Your Holy Presence and Name.

1/06/2001

"But what does it say? 'The word is near you, in your mouth and in your heart' that is, the word of
faith which we preach): that if you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your
heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. For with the heart one believes
unto righteousness, and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation."

Romans 10: 8-10 (NKJV)